It never rains but it pours, and it seems that May/June for me is traditionally stressful. Last year we scattered my dad’s ashes in Michigan, during a trip that had me stretched to my limits on my sanity… only to return home to discover that the IRS and I were going to be having big issues, and my employment was slated to end as the company was closing it’s CT office and people were going to be laid off en masse.
This year – my Step-Dad had his heart attack, strokes, and my mom had her own near heart attack. My son had his cyanosis that had us going in and out of hospitals for testing, and I started a new job, only to be distracted by the things in my personal life being overwhelming.
I can deal with a simmer, but when things reach bubbling/boil level I get close to cracking… and well I’ve been close.
Today I had a conversation with my new boss – seems I’ve been a bit distracted and it’s hard to judge if a new employee is actually going to be a good fit if they are so out of focus on everything in their life that they can’t see straight. That’s been me. I did tell her that the worst was over and I can say I feel that this is a good fit for me, reassuring her that yes I’ve been distracted, but I’ve really gotten a handle on it. Goddess I hope I have anyhow…
Notice I use the word “Been” as in past tense. It’s all come to a bit of a bubbling head, and instead of the continual teary-eyed mess I was last summer when I nearly cracked, this time I’ve focused my attention on doing something. Making something… taking the time to distress and find a way to say “See – I was productive.”
This weekend I dyed roving like a fool. Seriously, my front porch looks like it’s been hit with Roving Kudzu and we’re no longer in New England. The picture at right does it no justice... Sadly due to a thunderstorm and downpour I have very little dry to speak of and when I get home tonight I’ll have to check what dried today – if any as we may be getting more storms this afternoon. If it’s dry I’ll braid the roving up and set it aside to either sell on Etsy or spin my self.
What makes me think that it’s settled down now? Outside of rediscovering an outlet and throwing my self into it, I got news back from Garret’s doctor’s office. His EEG came back with good news. It appears he's fine - no details, but he shows no sign of seizures, nor was there any brain damage due to the cyanosis. Right now the leading theory is that he has had a lesser version of that nasty virus that attacks a person’s heart… which means that he has a natural immunity to it now, and we can breathe easier. Until I hear otherwise, that’s what I’m going to operate under, and I’ll let life get back to the normal simmer I’m used to.
I now return you to your regularly scheduled programming and what I write about in this blog normally…